Laert and his girlfriend stayed over at my house with lisa while I was away for some reason. I remarked on how cold it was where I was (it was actually very cold, Louisville without heat). I felt weird that he was at our house.

At a church event, people are talking about abortion. I get up and say they’re saying the same things over and over, making big circles with my hands, since I was a kid in church. Some of the older folks deride me. I talk to one of the older ladies about what the communication barrier was with the younger generation. Idk what she said.

Later some events happen. Im super depressed. I’m talking to Allison Horst who worked at Rstudio/posit. I leave without saying much. I grab a drink on my way out. I was going to go home and contemplate suicide. Im crying as i walk out the door, hoping someone would notice and stop me.