Posts for: #Self Harm

Work

On a time study. We’re tracking this person. Theyve got a rabbit?

Gathered at work event. Many in attendance. On a big lawn together. Steve and an unknown lady talking about business? Someone says it’s hard to describe to people what we do, in a sort of dismissive way. I look around (suddenly we’re at Ania’s house) and offer that it’s really not, we just maximize what we take from the customer, and minimize accidents (I really meant minimize what we pay for the accidents). Later I also add — to myself — we also maximize customers. I think I saw Nathan Breitch there.

%>% more()

Depression

Laert and his girlfriend stayed over at my house with lisa while I was away for some reason. I remarked on how cold it was where I was (it was actually very cold, Louisville without heat). I felt weird that he was at our house.

At a church event, people are talking about abortion. I get up and say they’re saying the same things over and over, making big circles with my hands, since I was a kid in church. Some of the older folks deride me. I talk to one of the older ladies about what the communication barrier was with the younger generation. Idk what she said.

%>% more()

Tooth

Dreamt my tooth cap fell off again. I dream this fairly regularly. I go to Progressive’s dentist, and I ask if I am supposed to be feeling anything in that tooth. She says no, of course not. I feel the empty uncapped tooth, it has the rough squishy texture of pulp.

The doctor readies her equipment. I’m concerned about anesthetic, but she’s looking at X-rays and I shouldn’t need it. Why she’s drilling, I’m not sure, the cap just needs to be reattached.

%>% more()

Battlebit

Dreaming I was inside a Battlebit match, but it was real. The enemy was swarming our position. I call a supply drop down as last resort cover. I throw grenades at several enemies, does not stop their approach. As they near me I have no choice; I pull out a grenade and frighten them off with it, but it explodes in my hand. Knowing I’m done for, I pull out two more grenades and put them at the top of my head. I feel the first one go off, but not the second; presumably I’d died.

%>% more()

Wasps

With my family somewhere. I make a racist joke to my father, swapping the e for a Jews to Jaws. He didn’t laugh.

Very suicidal early on. With my family, I break a wine bottle to cut myself with it. Family doesn’t try hard to help.

Practicing defense like a video game. Particular class lets one take down bugs easier.

A giant honey comb breaks a tree limb from limb. Parts land on an AC unit. Bugs start entering the house. Lisa untroubled.

%>% more()

Angry Colleagues

Work event. Henna is trying to flee in a minivan, Jeff Hester and I attempting to stop her. I shatter a window with my knife. Somehow I guess we manage to stop her.

We have a meeting, Zaucha is leading. Henna is babbling, and Steve tells me to shut up. I retort that it was not me talking but the rest of the “class” (felt like high school) started to say how much I talked in the last two meetings.

%>% more()